Thanks for Comin out, Illinois

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


Quick history lesson: Politicians used to be old, successful retirees who used their battle-tested-and-proven wisdom to steer the less-accomplished populace in the right direction. This is how our first few presidents got elected. They achieved, their achievements were recognized and appreciated, and that carried them to office. Our elected officials were kinda like what a company's Board of Directors looks like now: old, accomplished dudes showing the way.

Fast forward to June of 2010 in Illinois's Senate race. In the Republican corner we have Mark Kirk, who is known as the guy who lied about his accomplishments in the Navy. Not particularly classy coming out of the party voted Most Likely to War-Monger in their high school yearbook.

His opponent: Alexi Giannoulias, who is known as the guy who ran his father's bank into the ground when he was in charge of lending, totally shit the bed, quit, and the bank collapsed, partially under the weight of Alexi's poor performance. Now he wants to represent me.

Isn't this the exact OPPOSITE of what politics is supposed to be? Someone who failed to achieve a lot who resorted to lying, pitted against a proven private-sector failure.

Gotta love a bi-partisan system. And to think, I used to wonder why our country has gone to shit.









That's how I roll.

2010 Belmont Analysis

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

Update after seeing the Belmont: Whoops.

After looking at the race for the first time I thought that this would be a Belmont that we forget in five years. Ideally, you look at a Grade 1 race and think, "Wow! All of these horses are outstanding, I can't envision a scenario in which any of these 4 favorites lose. I can't believe at least 3 of them will go home a loser." but other times you think the opposite- "Wow. One of these horses gets to exit the track tomorrow as a Grade 1 winner? hmmmm. Well, tt's gotta be somebody I guess, lets see here.....". Saturday's Belmont Stakes falls under the latter heading.

When I see a race like that, I play contrarian and look for a horse that doesn't deserve to win to defeat another horse that doesn't deserve to win, but that has lower odds. Great horses rarely get beat- Curlin, Zenyatta, Rachel, Ghostzapper, Smaryt Jones, Azeri, etc. They are talented, run to form, and their best is nearly always enough to win AND they usually have their best.

Our Belmont has no such horse. It's easy to think Ice Box is THE MAN because he has run two good races. Looking only towards this race, he appears as a looming, scary figure. But a step back reveals that this monster isn't all that scary. This is a Grade 1 race, yet it took him 4 races to break his maiden. After that his handlers said, "whew. thank god he broke his maiden (at the Meadowlands, no less). He can't be that awesome, lets just put him in an Allowance race for his next one." they did and did he go off as the favorite in that modest race? Nope. He went off at 6-1 and to his credit, he won. The victory gave his handlers the confidence to enter him in a Grade 2- where he finished 5th of 10, beaten by 12 lengths.

This is the scary, bully on the block? Really? Despite my Devil's Advocacy there, I think he is the most logical win contender, but he is just the best of what's in front of us. None of these horses are historically good, and none of them have established a history of running to form.

In other words, there are few surprises when AWESOME horses run. Surprises happen in the lesser ranks, and I think this race falls under that heading. I am looking for a surprise. When a huge shocker happens on the track, usually my next thought is not, "I am shocked that unbeatable horse has been vanquished." It's, "I knew that dog horse wouldn't run to his 'form', he's just a two hit wonder."

I am expecting to say that at the end of the Belmont. Now the challenge is to find 1) the good horse(s) that disappointed, 2) the good horses that were legit favorites and finished in the money, and 3) the longshot/dog that was running well at the right time, ran the race of his life, and knocked off an overrated horse. In South America they refer to this kind of horse as "la Sopresa"- "the Suprise". That's not an easy task, but since it pays to try, I'll do just that.


Analysis

This is the only race all year I handicap for breeding and distance. The first thing I do when I look at the race, my first round of cuts, if you will, is to eliminate the horses who can't get the distance, and note the horses that might love the distance. The race that inspired this modus operandi was of course Birdstone beating Smarty Jones.

First things is first for me: does AP Indy have any progeny in this race? Yes. 3 grandsons- Ice Box, First Dude and Fly Down. The three favorites. If my fat neighbor were the grandson of AP Indy, he'd go off at 25-1 in the Belmont. Point being that they lose value for being related to AP Indy. Sure, it's for good reason, but we're just looking for value here.

After looking at the first horses (numerically in Post Position order I think, respectively): Get out of the race, get out of the race, get out of the race, you're likely a last-out one-hit wonder and you lost on that one hit. That = bad value Thanks for comingout top 4."

Bring us the to 5, Fly Down. That name makes me think it means "zipper down" and I'll be honest, I dislike the mental imagery. Anyway, he seems legit enough- his grandfather is AP Indy who won this race in 1992 and sired Jazil and Rags to Riches, two recent Belmont winners. His dad was awesome, and his connections appeared to have always pointed him to route races. His recent bullet work was noted as well. All positives. We'll come back to him.

6- Ice Box. I think he's the legit favorite, but in a race like today's, that is all relative. He's 3-1, and does appear to the best horse, but he is still highly beatable. If he loses by 14 lengths tomorrow you won't think, "What??? No way! How??" You'll throw up your hands and say, "Yeah, I guess he just strung together two good races and those were his career best. We saw him fall back to Earth today.". I try not to leverage too heavily on those horses, but, conversely, if he does win I'll think. "Wow, good for him. I guess he was legit." We'll come back to him either way and decide if he's worth 3-1.

7- I'll put my cards on the table here- I can't wait to bet against him and I hope he goes off as the 3rd or 4th choice.

8- Game on Dude (I'd call him Gay Mon Dude, if I were trackside with my friends). Not by AP Indy, but as a half-brother to Ghostzapper, his pedigree gets my attention/respect. It looks like his connections have always thought of him as a router. Reading his 4 race history from his first race to his last I'm thinking, "Sucked, won a maiden, got humilated after his owners got excited and thrust him in a Gr. 1." then it takes a turn to, "sold and trained by Baffert ok. Baffert (or his veternarian) worked his magic and he improved by 30 BSF points in his second race. Interesting."He didn't beat the world in his last race, but he beat every horse he faced, won comfortably and at a distance and on dirt. This could be the beginning of a trend.". His works show 2 bullet workouts at Santa Anita over Synthetic which intrigues me before the Belmont, even if he was ridden Handily and wasn't merely Breezing. From what I gather about Poly is that it is a bit more tiring than dirt, so his bulleted works on a tiring surface may make for a verrryyy interrressssssting prep before the longest race of his life. We'll come back to him.

9- Stately Victor. I get that he's a wiseguy's longshot, but I'm betting against him. I think he's a BSF two-hit wonder and won't be in the mix tomorrow. He's had plenty of chances to show us he's a dominant horse, and he only showed that a half of a time, sauntering past horses that were running backward in a questionably-stocked race. If he wins I won't have a seizure, but I can't bet on everyone. next.

10- Stay Put. Steve Haskin is high on this guy, and he does appear to offer good value at the very least. Getting the distance shouldn't be as much of a problem for him as it is for others- his grandfather is Unbridled, and it looks like he's always been a router. He is one of three horses whose last 3 races have all produced an 89 Beyer or higher (Uptowncharlybrown and Drosslemeyer are the other two. That could be an interesting angle for a huge Trifecta box). So I appreciate his consistency in this race of horses who are either two hit wonders, or just starting a really nice stretch of races. While he doesn't win a whole hell of a lot, I do like how he always improves his position from his last call to his finish. My guess is that he won't win or vie for the Exacta, but he's type of horse you leave out in your tri and after getting the exacta you look up and think, "Ohhh, who got third? Was it my horse??? What? it was Stay Put?? How'd he clunk up? *checks Racing Form* Oh. Well, yeah I guess that isn't shocking. I just missed him." But since we're looking for value here, we'll come back to him.

11- is he Da' Tara nouveau? Can he steal this race on the lead? Gotta remember he is by AP Indy, afterall. Those are positives. What else is there to like about him? Oh right, very little. What can you really COUNT on him for? If we average his last 4 Beyers to try to estimate how he might run on Saturday- we see the average is 91.25, great. So we'll pencil him in to run a 91.25 Beyer which should put him.......out of the money. So this horse is 7-2 and has reason to run a 91.25 Beyer is a Grade 1. Where I come from that is called bad value. This is the kind of horse you bet on and think, "Well I can't leave him out, he's the second favorite!" and not, "Sweet, this horse has it locked up.". We aren't betting those kind of horses for this edition of the Belmont. But...he is the only horse we are POSITIVE will have the lead at some point, so we will reluctantly take another look at him.

12- I'm looking for him on VH1's new show, "So your career best BSF is a 94 (and 2nd best is 89) and you think you can win a Triple Crown Race, even though your last 6 races haven't been on dirt?". What was your favorite of his wins in 2010? Well, with all of the zero wins to choose from, that question becomes rather difficult. Not my guy.

Phase 2

So who is left? Fly Down, Ice Box, Gay Mon Dude, Stay Put and First Dude (defensively). We could be wussies and box them all for an exacta or trifecta, but we won't just yet. We'll see how the race should shape up.

Upon further review- Stay Put is sorta hard to like in this spot. What I like most about him is that he is consistent and wins at nearly a 50% clip (he is for 2010). But, his two finishes off the board were 5th place finishes in Grade 2 races whose field had un-awesome horses. He's the weak link of our final 4, but worth including in exotics due to his consistency and his value.

What we do know is that First Dude will get sent to the lead, and then something will happen. He is talented enough to wire the field if he gets loose on the lead, so who will catch him? The three remaining horses we have all seem to know where the wire is and pass horses as they near it- that's a good sign for them, but will anyone duel with First Dude on the lead and loosen him up any for our closers? I kinda think the 2 and 3 horse might. My guess is that their owners/trainers are telling the jockey, "look, we probably can't win. we lack talent and we drew inside. IF we have any chance of winning, it will have to be a ground-saving trip near the lead. Give our horse a chance." And I think that will be enough to make sure that First Dude doesn't get away with his hair combed. He may take the lead down the homestretch for a bit, but eventually this will happen. You'll think: "Holy crap, he's still on the lead! Is he stealing this race? He's had the lead forever down the stretch. I think he did just steal the race!! Holy cow! Wait, where is the wire? Oh right this is Belmont and there is a long ways to g.....HOLY CRAP WHO ARE THESE TWO HORSES SPRINTING DOWN THE MIDDLE OF THE TRACK??!!!! They're going to pass him? Holy crap, I forgot how long the Belmont is!!"

And that's the scenario I think will unfold. It could be 3 horses chasing him and only one passes him, or maybe all three will pass him and a few others. I just don't think he'll wire the field.

Looking at Formulator to determine which horse of the remaining three has the best closing kick was a little inconclusive, but it does look like Game On Dude is the weakest of the three. I'd say that Ice Box has the best, with Fly Down in the middle.

BETTING

I will use all five of my "we'll come back to" horses in some exotics.

Our 5 horses were:

5 Fly Down
6 Ice Box
8 Game on Dude
10 Stay Put
11 First Dude


I'd do a trifecta that looks like this: 5,6/5,6,8,11/5,6,8,10,11. Since I think that will be how it shapes up.

If the 11 were better value, I'd include him on top. BUT he is the only horse that we are positive will be in the lead. Whenever that is the case I try to key on him in an exacta, so we'll hope to get some value on the back end of our:

11/5,6,8,10 exacta

Then I'd swing for the fences with a 8,10/5,6,8,10,11 exacta.







That's how I roll.

I tell you what else pisses me off: Perceived News

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter



The worst type of headline by far is the type that asks whether or not we should be outraged: "Were Glenn Beck's Comments Sexist?" or "Is that Billboard Offensive?". If you are not totally totally outraged within .0005 seconds of hearing it, it isn't shocking or offensive. Outrage is never the result of sitting around like Rodin's Thinker then, in light of all the evidence you have weighed, you are outraged and offended.

What these headlines are really announcing is, 'Slow News Day!' or, 'We're trying to make a scandal for you, America, but we just don't have the materials. Stay tuned!'. It's petty, it's lazy and it isn't a story. It's like a fat lady in bikini, we know what you're wanting to do, but you don't have the goods necessary to do so, let's go with Plan B.

The headline I hate the second most, I'd categorize under then heading of, "uhhh, I don't know. Everyone is talking about him/her/then, so I thought I'd put them in a headline". Case in point: That missing Jonas Brother, Justin Bieber.

Today the Huffington Post had a story that I didn't click on called something like, "6 Justin Bieber Quotes That Remind us he is Still a kid". My first reaction was to be insulted that my home page's editor assumed that I sit back and 1) think about that guy and, 2) while I am thinking about him I think, "man, it seemed like yesterday he was a squeeky-voiced, annoying corporate automaton with a laughable hair(non)cut trying to sell black music to white girls and who seems to be all over Twitter and everywhere else. But now he is so grown up and adult-like. I guess I should just admit he's a grown man now. Doesn't he have a PhD or something? Wait, is he older than me??"

There is no way anyone at the Huffington Post cares about that guy. And they should be positive zero of their readers do too. Their editor got lazy again and thought, "Well, I mean his name is everywhere. I guess we'll put him on our page."

Stop. That kinda thinking is the difference between him being another, predictable, dispensable, cyclically-occurring, and a media sensation. As soon as there is a void in the tween demograhic someone will fill the void- New Kids on the Block, NSync, Backstreet Boys, Hanson, Justin Timberlake, Miley Cyrus, Jonas Brothers, etc. There is never a vacuum because that's Disney money out the window. There is always one, and it's currently his time for another two years.

It's like the Ecuadorian president. Sure we know there is one at all times, and I'm sure people closest to there find it to be a big deal, but that doesn't mean I need to start caring. The HuffPo got lazy and said, "well we don't care. And you probably don't, but if you do, here's some stuff on this annoying guy your daughter screams over." I don't call that news.

The job of a newspaper is to say, "Hey guy on the street. While you were working we searched around and unearthed this story. You will want to read it because it affects you and you'll be better for this knowledge." not, "Hey, here's this lame-o story. If you care. I mean,I don't personally care, but you might cuz everyone's talking about it. I don't know."

That's called Infotainment and it makes our country dumber. You know how our country's kids are stupid and so are nearly all adults? That kinda crap is why.







That's how I roll.

Where I Draw The Line With Soccer Jargon

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

I wanted to get this out before the 2010 World Cup started because this has been annoying me forever.

It makes sense that soccer jargon doesn't sound very American Englishy- the game was neither invented here nor thrives here. Given how geographically dispersed the game is, it also stands to reason that it might have a few verbal oddities too and I'm totally ok with that. At the risk of sounding too jingoistic, there is still one I cannot stand. But first I'll review the tolerable ones.

Pitch- the playing field. As in, "he was the best player on the pitch tonight." I don't know why they can't just call it a "field", but we call a baseball "field" a diamond, so I guess I can cut them some slack.

Nil- zero. As in, "his team lost 3- nil." It sounds a little Eurotrashy, and for some reason seems to be used only for soccer, but I guess I'm ok with it. Well, I'm ok when foreigners use it. I hate when American soccer fans feel obligated to say "nil" as if it ups their soccer credibility.

Match- usually it's a soccer match and not a soccer game. As a former tennis player I am ok with that because I know that in tennis you play points, games and sets, which are collectively known as a match.

Football- I wish the rest of the world called it soccer, but I must concede that calling it football makes a lot more sense than us calling our football, "football".

Here's what annoys me about soccer lexicon- when people refer to a country as plural, as in, "England are very strong right now and should advance to the finals", or, "If Argentina are really ready for the challenge, we'll see it early on."

The country, (e.g. England, Argentina) is singular. It is only one country. Conversely, their team, though it comprises several players, is still singular. The singular verb in that case is "is.". You say, "where is your shoe (singular)?" and "where are your shoes (plural)?". One may correctly say, "The players on Spain are in top form" but you can't say, "Spain are in top form".

Sadly, stupidly, maybe arrogantly, annoyingly, lamely, unfortunately, seriously-what-the-fuck-ly, this grammatical rule is repeatedly broken in an attempt to sound more soccer credible. The same a-hole who will say, "Where is my book? I have zero books. Where are your books?" will later put on a soccer jersey, and turn on the soccer match and state, "England are great. They'll win 4-nil." . And it is fucking awful.

As indicated above, I'm ok with some with some slang unique to one's sport. I don't chastise snowboarders for riding "goofy" or getting "squirrelly". It's how snowboarders talk, and that's cool. But they still have the dignity to keep the rules of grammar in tact. They don't say, "Dude, hill steep I anyway down ride it to the wall balls, bro. What? Oh no, it's ok to make my own syntax because I'm talking about a sport, bro." They know better.

With all of this crappiness (sadly) in mind, the real question is: Do I sound more learned about soccer when I make a poor, jargon-buttressed prediction like, "America are going to win the World Cup 6-nil over Argentina." or when I use non-soccer jargon but make a rational prediction. "If Tevez gets injured Argentina is not going to win 3-zero, but probably 3-1."?

Don't bother trying to answer it. It's an Ancient Chinese Riddle.

That's how I roll.

I was Right. Again.

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

The NYPost's Page 6 is confirming what I predicted on March 2, that Erin Andrews would wind up dating her dancing partner.

I know, I know, you're thinking, "I think everyone predicted that." But here's the kicker, I knew you were going to think that!

That's how I roll.

It's Nice to Know I am Being Heard

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


Chicago Tribune beat writer Paul Sullivan just released this article stating that the Cubs suck. He goes on to mention that they suck by any definition of the word, but suck grandiosly when their high payroll and ticket prices are considered. None of that is new, but what Sullivan reports that is new is that the Cubs front office is finally aware of this.

For the record, I am smarter than the Chicago Cubs because I posted this on 4/10, this article on 4/13 and this article on 5/11. You know who else is smarter than the Cubs? Every single person on Earth. I don't read any Cubs blogs, but I have reason to suspect I wasn't the only Cubs fan making similar points.

Was this realization really all that diffult to foresee? It was like the Cubs front office was juggling plastic explosives in a boat and thought it was totally reasonable. Then after a few botched juggling attempts they kept at it. Only after another drop, a hole in the boat and the ship retaining gallons of water did someone think, "Wait....hang on a minute here.....this hole in the boat is actually a BAD thing.....now just hear me out on this one, you guys...."

It's one thing to field a lousy team. It's another thing to command high ticket and concession prices, but you can't do both. Even Cubs fans will turn their backs eventually. If you're dating Halle Barry and she cheats on you, you might do your best to work through it and see to it that it doesn't happen again. But if the chick from Precious cheats on you, you tell her to get the fuck out.









That's how I roll.

Is Kendry Morales Wussier Than Bill Grammatica and that Soccer Celebration guy?

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter



















That's how I roll.

A Name for the Israeli Relief Boat Raid

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

I'm leaning toward Bay Of Latkes right now.

That's how I roll.

Quality Road Hiney Kicking Chronicles: 2010 Met Mile Edition

(Quality Road photographed above, Vladimir Putin up. Seriously, that's Quality Road. Ok, fine it's not)

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

Quality Road did it again, winning the 2010 Metropolitan Mile at Belmont on Monday.

Now, I'm not a licensed equine Psychologist (though I still practice), but it has been said before that when all you have is a hammer, eventually everything looks like a nail. Now put yourself in Quality Road's horse shoes for a minute: All Quality Road has are 4 hooves, and eventually every other racehorse looks like a hiney and he just kicks them. Every single one, every single time in Chuck Norris-like fashion.

That's my theory anyway. How else could you explain that a horse runs fast?






At the 16th pole Quality Road said, "Oh hi, Musket Man. Say, that musket sure is shiny. Now excusve me while I kick your hiney."

All kidding aside, Musket Man ran very well. He's turned into a really nice horse and one of the best horses ever to come out of the Illinois Derby.

That's how I roll.

Kobe or LeBron? or Jordan? Answer that question and you are dumb

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


The Kobe or Lebron debate needs to stop. Not just because I think one player is clearly better and it isn't a discussion, but because the discussion is pointless.

Who cares? Even if you could theoretically "win" that debate and convince your fellow arguer that one of the two is better, what have you gained?

If I could go to a lab and prove objectively that one is better than the other, then broadcast my findings to the world, ending all debate on that topic forever, how would your life be different tomorrow?

Would LeBron or Kobe's life be any different as a result? No.

Everyone loves talking about it. Problem is, no one likes listening to it. Do any of your friends ever say, "Shhh shhhh shhh, guys shut up! Matt Weiner and Linda Cohn are arguing about whether LeBron is better than Kobe!"? or, "I'm going to bed. Wake me up if someone debates LeBron vs. Kobe. See you in the morning."

Ditto for Jordan talks. That guy's name is on Sports Center every single time I watch it (which is about never, I'm not a masochist). For what? It's a lazy reference.

You are journalists. If you think Kobe is historically great, tell us that and explain your rationale and give us some statistics. Don't lazily say, "Is Kobe better than Jordan?". Do your job as a journalist, do some research, break down some salient points and articulate them cleverly for us the reading consumers.

Then tackle important debate topics like: Hot dog vs. hamburger, mustard vs. ketchup, chocolate vs. vanilla and dogs vs. cats. And please hurry. I am absolutely dying to hear all of your opinions on such pressing, fact-based debates.








That's how I roll.

I Just Came up With my Competitive Eating Alias

(photo courtesy of this flickr page)
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

After seeing Dario Franchitti win Indy yesterday, I felt inspired.

Inspired to call myself Dario FrankEatty if I ever compete in the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Competition at Coney Island on July 4th, that is.









That's how I roll.

Sip it and tip it: Gary Coleman

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter





That's how I roll.

Ancient Chinese Riddle, in Association with TR Salutes, Presents: Cub fan Beer Catch

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


One day a few thousand years into the future, someone will assume this was ancient chinese riddle:

Is the guy in the movie a Gentleman or a Dude? I mean sure he's a dude. No question whatsoever. He's highly rated on the dude scale. But I mean, isn't that the most chivalrous, and thereby gentlemanly thing you can do? Like what Jack Donaghy or The Most Interesting Man in the World or James Bond would do in that position?












*GONG*












That's how I roll.

Article Link Corprolalia: Matt Taibi, Lionel Messi, a Shakespear Imposter, Banksy, M.I.A., and a Rap Song about Harold's Chicken Shack

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

This should be two posts but I'm making it one just so I can be the only blogger of all time to put these together.

First two great articles I read today. And one yesterday. And it took me damn near all day.

1. Matt Taibbi's very important read about our impotent congress grabbing its ankles for wall street and their lobbyists.

2. Sports Illustrated's awesome article about the LeBron James of soccer- Lionel Messi and his relationship with his coach, and is the Babe Ruth of Argentinan soccer, Diego Maradona (pictured above as Lego). If you more or less know most of the story, this article is well-researched (and yes, long) enough to still teach you a lot of new stuff and if you are excited about the World Cup but aren't too familiar with who is good or any storylines, this might be a good place to bone up on your knowledge to make the World Cup more interesting.


3. Not to drink too much of the haterade, but the NYT Magazine coverstory on M.I.A. is good. She had it comin.

4. these two banksy articles. This one on Slate and this one on Salon.

5. This truth-is-stranger-than-fiction story about a teenager who forged a Shakespeare play in England in 1795 and it was made into a play and totally busted because it sucked. It's a sweet article. It's at SmithsonianMag.com


Now the video goods: The Chi doin big thangs in their homage to Chicken Noodle Soup, shown below.

you're welcome.





Dear TR,

They're eating chicken wings on the dance-floor, how playa is that mang?


-Delonte West.








I love that she's wearing Stan Smith's in the very beginning!








That's how I roll.

Two Ideas for ORIGINAL News Talk Shows

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


A lot of stuff sucks and daytime news television is among them. One of the biggest problems is that they are all the same- every show from 12 until 6 on ESPN is the exact same. Same is true for the time slots on CNN, MSNBC and Fox News. Same topics, same/similar guests. As Donna Brazille recently said, daytime news needs more stories and less pundits out scoring points everyday for their respective teams (i.e. political party). I have two ideas.

1) Have a show called News You Didn't Hear Yet Today. If that show were to air here is what it would not talk about today- The oil spill, don't ask don't tell, Immigration legislation, Bipartisan failures. Even ESPN could use this. Instead of recapping last night's games, predicting tonight's games, talking about the latest scandal then in a moment of failed levity talking about pop culture they could actually, oh, I don't know, unearth a story. Not in that lame-o Human Interesty way that ESPN360 tries to do. Talk about the sports that don't get coverage- horse racing, tennis, soccer, iditarod, cycling or any college sport other than baseball or basketball.

I feel like my learning curve for television watching really flattens out about after 19 minutes of daytime tv. Why would I watch Dylan Ratigan, Chris Matthews, then Ed Shulz on MSNBC? they're the same show. What are you laughing at FoxNews? You do the same exact thing.

2) A news show that interviews regular citizens and allows them to discuss how current stories affect them. It could maybe be kinda like Larry King, but with less softball type questions. Like if Rachel Maddow sat in for Larry King one night. I wouldn't even mind if they talked about all the rehashed topics listed above- it would at least be something I wouldn't tune out. I enjoy hearing fisherman in the Gulf tell their stories about how the spill affects their lives. They could interview people affected by the proposed Arizona immigration legislation, people affected by don't ask don't tell, the new health care, etc.

I'd rather hear it from them than I would from Wolffe, Dick on Countdown with Keith Olbermann telling me how this will affect real citizens. Here's an idea- forget the wussy, and just interview the real citizens. Seriously, that guy is on at least 14 times a week.

With all of this punditry going on today, it's hard to take people at their word. They are either trying to score points for their team, score points with the host so they can be back again to promote their new book, or trying to be outlandish for the sake of self-promotion. Most startlingly, they could actually be telling the truth this time. We just don't know. Ordinary citizens would still probably do that to some extent, but much less so.

Oh and get rid of Rick Sanchez on CNN. Holy Moly Buttholey is that guy unwatchable. His ratio of people he's drunkenly murdered vehicularly to minutes I have enjoyed his show is: 1:0. The ideal ration would closer to 0:400.





That's how I roll.

I'm Going Sappy on you

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


This picture hung in my room as a kid and I just saw a pic of it on the internet. Its hard to see in this picture but it says, "If you love somebody show it".

It's as obvious as it is simple, but I am always surprised at how few people follow such easy-to-follow common sense.

Robert Hunter wrote and Jerry Garcia sang, "Sometimes the cards aint worth a dime if you don't lay 'em down".





That's how I roll.

It Looks Like You Just Got Yourself a new Favorite Racehorse

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

Sorry this is in French, but there isn't a whole lot I could do about it.




Above is Goldikova, the Euro equivalent of Rachel Alexandra or Zenyatta, only better*. Her 2010 season got off to a perfect start with a 1/2 victory in the Grade 1- Prix D'ispahan at Longchamp (further reading can be had here). Along with Zenyatta, it's great to see a champion horse racing well into horsey adulthood at age 5. Any European horse that is 2 for 2 in Breeders Cup races, and is still racing automatically cracks my top 5 favorite European horses of all time. Great story any way you slice it.

Oh, but she isn't the horse I was implying will be your new favorite. Our new favorite horse was actually the German horse that finished third in that race. His name is Wiener Walzer.





Here he is winning the 2009 German Galop Derby. Start listening at the 2:02 mark. Stop giggling probably never.






* denotes- it makes for a great horse racing debate, but what is not debatable is that she is a total monster.



That's how I roll.

You Want More Graffiti? Ok.

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter

watching this stuff never gets old to me.






That's how I roll.

Lookalikes v. 36.0 Rand Paul and Mayor Carcetti from the Wire

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


Old boy Randy is on the left.






That's how I roll.

Chicago men Straighten out a Doofus

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter


I won't put in my $.02 about Hanley Ramirez's dumb actions, but I will quote two other guy's two cents. Both former Cubs. Both referred to physical confrontation. Sadly, only one of them has a jheri curl. But hey, it's better than zero.

First, Rick Sutcliffe was quoted on Marlin's beat-writer Joe Capozzi's Twitter page: Ex-pitcher Rick Sutcliffe re: Hanley's loafing-I don’t know if I could woop Ramirez or not but after watching that, we would’ve found out.

Love it.

ESPN reported this about Hall of Famer Andre Dawson's conversation with , fellow hall of famer Tony Perez and Hanley Ramirez, "Dawson said he did most of the talking, according to the report. He said he started the lesson this way, with Perez at his side: " 'I'm not going to say a lot, because if you say the wrong the thing to me, then you might wind up on the floor on your rear end.'


The city with broad shoulders, baby.




That's how I roll.