Showing posts with label Mongy Ramirez. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mongy Ramirez. Show all posts

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Mongy Ramirez and the Hall of Fame Question


By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com

You know how some people preface their argument with, "I'm sorry but.."? I'm not one of those people.

I just read an ESPN poll that asked the question:

With the news of his suspension, does Manny Ramirez get your vote for the Hall of Fame?
A) Always had my vote
B) Doesn't have my vote anymore
C) Never had my vote

While I think that is a very good question, and the answer choices provided are good choices, I was disappointed in America's answers. 50% answered A, 31% went with B, and 20% chose C.I'm sorry but, 71% of those answers are not acceptable. C is indefensible and A is not much better.

If Mongy has cloudy piss, and you still put him in the Hall, then what is the point of testing? If you believe in science, then you necessarily believe that Mongy cheated. For those that voted for option A, I think their rationale is something like this, "He may have flunked one test, but that doesn't prove he cheated for years on end. He passed numerous tests and for all we know, he could have taken a banned drug one time. That shouldn't erase a career's worth of work". Believing that statement is a perversion of logic. No one can deny that steroid tests have historically been rife with false-negatives (e.g. a guilty player taking a designer steroid that the tests cannot detect, resulting in a passed test), but who believes there are any false positives? If you believe in false positives, then the testing process has no legitimacy whatsoever.

What perplexes me is why do so many people feel that players are entitled to be in the Hall of Fame? If you believe cheaters belong in the HOF, what's the point of having a Hall of Fame? In response to the Mongy apologists who claim, "One failed test should not ruin a career's work" I say this, "You are wrong. It absolutely should." Much like I'm unable to prove that one flunked test doesn't necessarily mean there was a lifetime of cheating, apologists cannot prove that he did NOT cheat for a career. Positive tests create doubt, and the Hall of Fame should be doubt free. I could not care less if no player is inducted into the HOF for the next 15 years, the point of the HOF is to honor the best of the best, with the honesty of their achievements being assumed in the definition of "best of the best".

Already, I can anticipate the criticism to my argument- I claim we must have faith in testing, yet I am willing to discredit all of Manny's previously passed tests. According to my line of rationale, Manny's positive test should prove that he started taking steroids sometime after his last negative test, right? Wrong.

Mongy tested positive for a female fertility hormone, a banned substance (hCG) that is used after a steroids cycle to kickstart one's system into making its own testosterone again. No rational athlete would take such a system-jarring drug like that, especially if it were banned, if they were not taking steroids. An ESPN article states:

Ramirez's case was set off when a test in spring training revealed he had elevated levels of testosterone in his body. MLB followed up with a more comprehensive test that confirmed the testosterone had to come from an artificial source, the sources said........The hCG use, a doping expert told ESPN, would have been separate from the use of the artificial testosterone reflected by MLB's testing.

So in the Spring he had too much testosterone, and a recent test confirmed he still had artificial testosterone in his system that was different than the kind of testosterone found in the Spring. That defeats the theory that Mongy was a one-time user. Does that prove he had used performance enhancing drugs in any previous season? No, but it proves he is a cheater; by definition, cheaters cannot be trusted. So if you want to take your kids to the Hall of Fame, pay $16.50 to get in, shouldn't you not have to hope that the inductees' statistics are legitimate?

Would you pay to go to an art museum if you knew that all of the works were forgeries? What if only some were forgeries, but you weren't sure which? I'm in favor of removing all doubt. Mongy Ramirez has raised such doubt.

Mongy Ramirez: I got it poppin, and got the panties droppin' with Gonadotropin


By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com



I stole this quotation from this ESPN Link

However, two sources told ESPN's T.J. Quinn and Mark Fainaru-Wada that the drug used by Ramirez is HCG -- human chorionic gonadotropin. HCG is a women's fertility drug typically used by steroid users to restart their body's natural testosterone production as they come off a steroid cycle. It is similar to Clomid, the drug Bonds, Giambi and others used as clients of BALCO.

You're a very fertile woman, Manny.

Request and Dedication Hour, With Your DJ TR Slyder



By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com

I got this letter from a special gentleman in Chicago, Illinois it reads,

"Dear TR,

Mongy Ramirez is a GD 'roid monkey like I've always suspected. He helped steroids break the Curse of the Bambino, and he helped keep holding the Cubs down. He is a juicing liar, a fraud and a general fucking mongoloid all around. Classy of him and his agent to take Los Angeles hostage in their contract talks, only to see LA give in to the PR pressure and capitulate. Then Mongy stabbed them in the back with being a roid fiend. What a colossal dickbag.

So TR would you please play request and dedication? I want to dedicate Biggie Small's "Juicy" to Mongy Ramirez. You know what TR? It's like Biggie says, "And if you don't know, know you now, nicka."

Signed,

Tito Swanson"


Tito, thank you for your moving letter, and I'll do you one better with the Biggie/Mongy lyrics- "Spread 'roids it's the BX way." Anyway, It would be my honor to play that. Since this email was about a juiced-out 'roid monkey, I'll even change my tagline for my dedidacion-
Tito, keep a needle in your ass, your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars! Here is your request and dedication.


Manny Ramirez Got That Cloudy Tinkle





















By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com

Manny Ramirez failed a drug-test and is now suspended 50 games. I told my Red Sox-loving friend that Manny was a juicer. He entered the league as a solidly built guy, and he eventually became a hulking pile of muscle. Thanks for cheating to sweep the Cubs out of the 2008 postseason, anus.

Remember how he and his agent Scott Boras held out for so long in their contract talks, demanding more money? Who knew it was possible for Boras to be more hated? Thanks for making sure you won't be (sweeping the Cubs) in the postseason, Manny! I tried to find a clip of Manny leaning over the plate, flicking out his bat and hitting a 430 foot home run to center field, but couldn't find it. This was the runner-up clip.



What was the last good thing to come out of Los Angeles? Anything?

Here is a pic of the aforementioned home run. Does this look like a prototypical home run swing? Bent over the plate and about to fall over? There's a reason you don't see many home run swings like this- much less, home runs to center field- most players aren't 'roid monkeys.

In fact, I've just called him Manny Ramirez for the last time- from here on out it's Mongy Ramirez exclusively.