Showing posts with label Live Blog. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Live Blog. Show all posts

Monday, March 2, 2009

Late Night With Jimmy Fallon Live Blog

By: T.R. Slyder,

I love Conan and was as critical of Jimmy Fallon on SNL as anyone else was. But I figured I'd give him a shot.

9 minutes in, so far, so good. The writing so far from the dialogue has been good. He joked about Rush Limbaugh calling him to hope he fails on his new show. He also joked that Obama agreed to bring the troops home in 16 months (or however many it is until 8/10), but the troops said "no thanks, the economy is better over here." He then had a guest make some kind of comment after a joke and Jimmy deadpanned, "Ok, please have that man removed. I hate when my dad drinks." I thought that was pretty decent ad-libbing. As I was typing all of that, he and his band, The Roots, did a funny piece which I assume will be a new running segment called "Slow Jammin' the News" where he took a news story and the Roots played a really R&B sexxed up beat (Think Keith Sweat, Isely Brothers, Isaac Hayes- some grown folk, baby makin' music) and they sang a news story as a song, complete with a lot of double entendres to make it sound like a sexy ballad. I was pretty amused.

Fallon struck me as playing the part of a tv show host a lot better than I thought he would. He didn't come out in a Salvation Army sweater with messy hair trying frat/stoner humor it up. He seemed like a believable host with a great house band and good writing. That's about all I ask for. I don't wanna stay up for every guest but his lineup this week might be the best week of guests in late night television history. It's basically a week of NBC telling every A-lister, "You owe us a favor, now come in and do Fallon's show." Or the converse of, "Would you like to do NBC/GE a favor and be in the good graces of one of America's largest companies? You would? Great, come on in and sit on Jimmy's couch, and we'll write you and I.O.U.."

After the monologue, he began a new game-show style show called "Lick It For $10", where 3 audience members come up, lick something, then return to their seats. The first guy just licked the motor part of a lawn mower. Then they showed a replay of it in slow-mo, while the roots laid down another great, baby-makin' lick (I was kinda happy with that pun. I hope you enjoyed it). The next chick had to lick a copy machine. Then the he asked the audience which part she should lick- and the audience voted on the glass part, where you put the actual sheet you are copying. Then after each guest earns their $10, Jimmy pays them out of his own wallet. The last gentleman is now required to lick a bowl of goldfish. Job well done and Jimmy paid the man.

I tried to embed this video, but embedding was disabled by YouTube. So I will have to send you a link to Jimmy Fallon's Idiot Boyfriend video. If you have never heard of the video, it came out about 5 years or so ago, and is pretty entertaining. If you're reading this blog, lets face it, you've got time to kill. So check it out. I'd like to dedicate the link to a very special who lives in Astoria, NY, who I know for a fact will be happy to click on the link.

Robert De Niro is on and Jimmy is pretty smiley and awe-struck, but it's his first interview, and it's a pretty huge get, so I can't blame him a ton just yet.

Ok, now Jimmy's being a little Jimmyish. He joked that he and De Niro have had similar careers. De Niro was in the Taxi Driver, and Jimmy was in Taxi. He then did a giggly impression of De Niro, and asked De Niro to recite a line from his movie, to which De Niro adopted a girly falsetto and said "Ohhh, I'm Jimmy Fallon." Non-hilarity ensued and they went to commercial. Everytime I've seen De Niro of Jack Nicholson on a show, the host acts awestruck, then talks about how he's so much more of a hardass then the he (the host) could ever hope to be, then De Niro/Nicholson busts on them, and the host giggles sheepishly. Way to switch it up Jimmy. The commercial break came at a good time.

Back from commercial, Jimmy sarcastically asks if De Niro remembers the movie they did together. Shockingly, they have a clip from that movie. Oh good, Jimmy giggled before his first line of the movie. So far, Jimmy plays a poontang, and De Niro a hard ass. Good thing I was seated for that one. Mercifully, it ended after about 15 seconds. That was the whole segment. Coming up after the break "The amazingly talented Justin Timberlake".

Justin Timberlake came out. If Fallon calls him "Mr. J.T." I'm never watching this show again. Mr. J.T. did a pretty funny impression of John Mayer's singing. It was good because he never said anything along the lines of "He's a good friend, but I bust on him anyway." Jimmy made a PC comment to the effect of, "obviously, we both know and like the guy and aren't trying to take the piss out of him." to which Timberlake said "Yeah...we make fun of him *shoulder shrug*", which led me to believe he maybe doesn't like him. I can respect that.

Aaaaand scene. After the break, I think Jimmy Said Van Morrison is coming out. Tomorrow's musical guest is Santogold, if you haven't heard of her, but you like M.I.A.'s music, you should check her out.

I'll be damned it is Van Morrison. He's singing his new song apparently. Wow, Van Morrison looks like Zoot from the Muppet Band, if he were paler than an albino's ass and very fat. Seriously.

"Stay tuned for Last call with Carson Daly, everybody." Oh good idea. In fact, put me down for a "Hell no", Jimmy.

Ok, bedtime for T.R..

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

White Sox vs. Twins Live Blog

By: T.R. Slyder,

The first half inning is over. Not much happened. Harold Reynolds, Ron Darling and Dick Stockton have the announcing duties on TBS. I guess this falls under the category of a playoff game, so TBS has the honors. I think Stockton is pretty terrible, and Darling brings zero to the table, but I'm interested in hearing Reynolds. I hope he makes reference to his desire to hug women in an inappropriate fashion at a Boston Market.

The big news so far is that this is going to be the first look of TBS commercials that I will quickly grow to nauseate me. Apparently, Frank TV hasn't been canceled yet and his new season starts later in October. Last year the Frank TV and Dane Cook "There's only one October!" commercials were so overplayed they made me want to boycott the shows they advertised. Frank TV is off to a good start this year at repeating.

More pertinent to the action: So far both teams put the leadoff man on, hit into a double play, then had their #3 hitter fail to reach base.

End of First. Score 0-0.

That brings Justin Morneau to the plate. I hope his teammates call him "Justin Mornography". He just struck out swinging. I guess I never noticed before how "struck out swinging" could be a double entendre. I suppose "struck out looking" also could be too, if you ask a chick out and she catches you looking at her boobs while you ask, so she declines. The Twins went 1,2,3 in the top of the second.

Jim Thome lead off with a walk, Konerko flew out to the warning track, and Griffey whiffed. Alexei Ramirez was greeted to a hero's welcome when he stepped into the batter's box. As well he should after last night's huge grand slam. This guy is scary good already as a rookie. Ramirez walked. First time tonight a team has a player in scoring position. On the next pitch Pierzynski grounded out to end the inning. The White Sox showed some offensive life with Konerko's fly out (he has a history of home runs in big games), and two walks.

Score still 0-0 End 2nd.
Third Inning

Top: Glens Falls, NY's own Brendan Harris leads off the third. I hope Linda Cohn doesn't call him "B. Hair.". That being said, B. Hair. just grounded out. If Harold Reynolds has one signature move, it has to be ending a spat of laughter with an "ahh, oh my goodness.". Nick Punto walked. Carlos Gomez popped out to the shortstop to bring up Denard Span, as all of you Spanish scholars know- Denard is Spanish for "of nard". Of nard grounded out to 1B to end the inning. Danks has a no hitter through 3 innings with his pitch count at 50.

This looks like October baseball so far, not much cooking offensively thanks to some quality pitching and defense.

Bottom: Juan Uribe got his groundout on to B. Hair. at third base. The guy with the only hit of the game, grounded out 3 pitches later, and DeWayne wise popped out two pitches later. That was like a 6 pitch inning.

Score is still 0-0, Danks has 50 pitches, and Blackburn is at 40.
4th Inning

That Bon Jovi "I love this town" commercial looks like it has a lot of potential for being excessively annoying in the days to come. I'm sure you'll hear more about that later in the week.

Top: 1 pitch, 1 out to Alexi Cassilla. There is an Alexi and an Alexei in tonight's game. Not sure if I've seen two Alex(e)is in a game before. That just proves Dane Cook's theory: There's Only One October!!! Danks just struck out Mauer for the second time. This guy is locked in. Mornography fouled out on the next pitch. That was a 9-pitch inning. Pitch count at 59, No hitter still in tact.

Bottom: Jermaine Dye leads off with a single to left. Jim Thome whiffed on a full count. He very nearly held his swing, but the third-base umpire ruled it a strikeout. That brings Konerko to the plate, we'll see if his last at bat showed that he's locked in or not. Apparently not. Konerko hit what should have been a double-play ball, but Konkero was safe on a throwing error to first base. Griffey fouled out. The leadoff single was squandered.

0-0. Danks pitch count is 59, and Blackburn's is at 53.
5th Inning

Before the game, Sox fans were issued with black towels. I didn't think they'd stoop to the towel-waving level. What is cool however, is that tonight's game was ordered to be a "Blackout" with all the fans wearing black. The fans did a good job of going along with it, an all-black-wearing crowd is pretty sweet to see.

Top: The TBS broadcasters just made their first mention of Danks not having given up a hit. What happened next? Michael Cuddyer leadoff with a double. They went from being no-hit to threatening to score pretty quickly. Delmon Young hit a sac fly to Griffey in center, Cuddyer advanced to third with one out. He's the first baserunner to reach third base for either team. Still only one out. WOW. Brendan Harris flew out to Griffey and Cuddyer got thrown out at home. That was a bang-bang play. Pierzynski took a hit and held on to the ball. Good play all around. Decent hitting, great throw, great catch and block, and pretty good baserunning. Gotta love fundamental baseball.

Bottom: Ramirez and Pierzynski went down pretty quickly- groundout and strikeout respectively. Uribe flew out. Another quick inning.

0-0 still, Danks is at 72 pitches and Blackburn at 62.

6th Inning

I'll admit it. TBS has done a good job of not overplaying any commercials just yet. I'm shocked too.

Top: Bonus points to Ron Darling for giving a shout out to Old Style beer. I think I'm gonna stop with the batter-by-batter commentary until there's action enough to justify it. That being said, the first two Twins- Punto and Gomez, were out pretty quickly. Span walked and is threatening to steal, drawing 3 straight throws over from Danks. Casillas whiffed, and Span was never able to steal. Danks count is at 87

This is kinda nice. Instead of taking us to commercial they just took us to Ernie Johnson at the front desk with Cal Ripken Jr. and Dennis Eckersley. Eck is still looking as porny as ever. If I had to bet my life on someone driving a sports coupe with the license plate "Swinger" it would definitely go with Dennis Eckersley. No question.

Bottom: Another boring 1,2,3 inning which is a testament to Blackburn being in command. His count is at 71.

Still 0-0
7th Inning

Oh sweet, new Sonic commercials. I love the commercials with the blond dude and the fluffy-haired dark-haired dude. Those are some of the best commercials I've seen in a long time. Another thing I feel obligated to point out: I'm not changing between channels this time because 1) my remote batteries died earlier this evening, and 2) I consider commercials part of the blog since I usually, resort to watching commercials during playoff baseball since I don't want to miss a pitch. Loyal WhereAwesomeHappens readers will recall that I spoke against commercial watching in my article about the rules of remote handling.

Top: 1,2,3 inning again. Danks' pitchcount at 93.

Bottom: JIM THOME LEADS OFF WITH A HOMERUN TO CENTER. Wow. Thome obliterated that pitch to VERY deep center. If it's any consolation to Twins fans, that HR was not a cheapie. No outs. Konerko grounded out. Griffey short-hops the wall for a 1-out double. Brian Anderson pinch-runs for Griffey and Alexei Ramirez was intentionally walked to set up the double-play. The Twins make a pitching change and bring in lefty Jose Mijares. If you were in my living room with me, I'd probably make some kind of "Jose, My hair is...." joke, but not now. It's too intense, and I'm trying to keep this blog up-to-the-inning with publishing in it to the web. No time for joking around this inning. (Unless it involves fat women). Pierzynski enters the box with guys on first and second and one out. A.J. grounded out to the first baseman and advanced the runners to second and third with two outs for Juan Uribe (if the game weren't so close I'd point out how his name sounds like "Won Your Ebay" then probably make a joke about someone who saying "Congratulations! You Juan Uribe bid, and are the proud owner of a refurbished iPod!" but not now). Uribe flew out to right field to end the inning.

White Sox 1, Twins 0. Danks at 93 pitches

8th Inning

Top: One pitch one out. Delmon Young flew out to right. Brian Anderson replaced Griffey in centerfield. Twins manager Ron Gardenhire can't be thrilled that Young swung at the first pitch in this situation. Brendan Harris singled to left field. That's Minnesota's second hit of the night, he's on first with one out. Matt Tolbert is pinch running for Harris. Danks is over 100 pitches. Double play!!!! The 6-4-3 variety. The White Sox got out of the inning unscathed. Danks finished the inning with his pitch count at 103.

Bottom: Defensively, Tolbert takes over Harris' duties at 3B. Both closers- Joe Nathan and Bobby Jenks- are up in the bullpen. Or as the Sox announcer, Hawk "The Hick" Harrelson calls him "BubbyJinxssss". Cabrera and Wise are retired without much of an incident.

Pitching Change: Joe Nathan comes in with two outs to face Jermaine Dye. Dye singles to left center, bringing Jim Thome to the plate. Alarmingly, the crowd didn't forget that Thome hit a home run last at-bat, and gives him a huge ovation. Thome just swung and missed on a 0-1 pitch, he's swinging out of his shoes again. I'm thinking he's either gonna strike out or hit an HR here. I was wrong, Thome flew out to left center to end the inning.

Sox 1, Twins 0. Last chance for the Twins coming up....
9th Inning

Top: Jenks is on to close it. Jason Kubel is pinch hitting for Carlos Gomez (the 9th hittier) to lead it off. To follow him will be the top of the order- Span and Casilla. Kubel strikes out swinging. One out. Denard Span is now at the plate. Span grounds out. Minnesota is down to their last out.
Brian Anderson made a fully-laid out. diving catch to end the Game. Sox Win!!! Sox Win!!! Sox Win!!!

White Sox win 1-0. John Danks gets the win, and Nick Blackburn is the tough-luck loser, and Jenks gets the save.

Both Chicago teams are in the playoffs.

Twins: 0 runs 2 Hits O Errors (I guess that wasn't a throwing error earlier like I said)
Sox: 1 5 hits 0 Errors

HR: Thome (34)