Cubs Emotion-o-Meter- 9/12 Edition: 16 Games Left To Go

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com

It's the bottom of the 9th and the Cubbies are gonna try to hold on to their 3-2 lead. I'll just live blog the rest of the game since I'm impatient.

10:12pm: Pinch Hitter Brendan Ryan steps into the batter's box. Luckily, I have never heard of him.

10:13: Glad I didn't say "he probably sucks" like I was thinking about saying. He just doubled to rightfield. He short-hopped the wall on breaking ball that didn't break.

10:14: HOLY BUTTHOLE PENIS FARTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Brendan Ryan DOES suck!!!!! The next guy for St. Louis bunted poorly to Derek Lee, who threw to third and narrowly missed Ryan. Ryan was safe. Then he OVERSLID the bag, and Aramis Ramirez tagged him out!!!!!!! That was awesome. Woweee. Wa wa we wa.

10:15: The next dude dunks a singles into left. Not an awesome sign. Guys on first and second one out. Cubs announcer Ron Santo's liklihood of having an H.A. during this game? Up to about 85%. On a good night it hovers around 60%. This is getting tight.

10:17: Praise baby Jesus. Wood struck out Aaron Miles.

10:18: Pujols is now at bat. Why does this always happen?

10:19: it's 2-0 on him. I hope they walk him. Ron Santo does too.

10:19: Looks like an unintentional intentional walk. All praise be to Allah.

10:20: Scratch that. it's 2-2. Oh boy. This could get non-awesome in a hurry.

10:20pm: Pujols popped out! Game over! We win! We're the best and they're the worst! Roll Steve Goodman's "Go Cubs Go!"

Ok, back to my business. Cubs won. Milkwonky lost (ha ha). The Magic number to win the division is now a Spinal Tapian "all the way up to 11". Or "down" to 11, actually. The Cubs' lead is 5.5 games with only 16 left to play. Luckily, Ron Santo, did not have an H.A.. Wow, that game was a doozey.

Due to Hurrican Ike, the Cubs regularly scheduled games for Friday and Saturday have been postponed, so the next Official Cubs Emotion-o-Meter posting is not scheduled until Sunday, but there could be a few unofficial postings if Milwonky happens to lose tomorrow or Saturday. We'll see. But before that happens, I need to commence with the goods.

The Cubs Emotion-o-Meter Word(s) of the Day: "Vigilant Optimism" still. Ordinarily a lead of 5.5 games with 16 play is a lot, but when you play that team 6 times, it's not quite as big. AND I used up all of my "being an arrogant, a-hole sports fan" points on the Patriots before the Super Bowl.

The Cubs Emotion-o-Meter Monkey Picture of the Day: Since I'm still exuberant after the win, and I downloaded some new monkey pics last night, I'm showing off. The Emotion of the Cubs fan monkeyified (i.e. personified by a monkey) is captioned "Take that, Milwonky"




Cubs Emotion-o-Meter 9/13 Edition

Zambrano No Hitter Edition!!!