By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
That is allegedly an undoctored photo of Lindsay Lohan in Court today. While the Judge was talking to her. If you look closely enough, you can see that it says, "fuck u" in black ink.
I wonder if she'd do that if she knew she'd be found guilty. Either way, it's awesome. I hope it's real.
That's how I roll.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
If This is Real, I Love Lindsay Lohan
Lookalikes v 38.0- Nate Silver and the Sklar Brothers
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
FiveThirtyEight.com's uber-statistician, Nate Silver looks like the Jose Oquendo-loving, Sklar Brothers. I can prove it.
see.
That's how I roll.
Anothe Reason to Love TheDirty.com
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
The little people in this picture are the "midgets" (their words not mine) from the MicroWrestlingFederation that I saw last year that changed my life.
I bought a shirt that said "I Support Midget Violence"
That's how I roll.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
My Full Name
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
People ask me what my real name is. The answer?
T.R. That Gigolo With the Lowest Jiggle Slyder
That's how I roll.
Wait....I'm Confused. So IS There Wildlife in South Africa or not?
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
It was a big deal for South Africa to get the 2010 World Cup. They are the first African nation to host a world cup, blah blah blah. So through the World Cup were to come to appreciate South Africa as a nation of the modern world that has arrived. Either get on the South Africa train or be left in its wake.
So with the in mind, why is that every time ESPN does a local, South African interest story that isn't about soccer, is it about wildlife? Zero of those stories that I have seen show even a city a block, a building, a taxi cab, a white collar business, an airport, architecture, mass transit, etc.
The World Cup and ESPN's ethos of, "If you don't believe South Africa is a 1st-World country, how do you explain all of these zebras and lions?", should be updated.
That's how I roll.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Salary Cost for Each Cub win vs. Salary Cost for Each Red Win
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
Sorry I didn't use charts for this, but you get the idea.
Through July 4th 2010.
The Cubs starter's 2010 salaries- : Wins
Zamrano: $18,875,000- 3 $6.2 mil/win
Dempster: $13,500,000- 6 2.25 mil/win
Lilly: $13,000,000- 3 4.3 mil/win
Silva: $12,790,000- 8 1.59 mil/win
Wells: $427,000 - 4 106,750/ win
Total: $58,592,000 24 = $2,441,333 per win
_____________________________________________
In contrast. The 2010 Reds' pitchers with the 5 most starts
(# of starts) 2010- Salary- Wins
Arroyo (17) $11,650,000- 8
Harang (17) 12,500,000- 6
Cueto (17) 445,000- 8
Leake (15) N/A- 5 (I counted this as "0" since it can't be a whole lot)
Bailey (9) 418,000 1
Total: 25,013,000- 28- $893,321 per winThat's how I roll.
Most Cubs Play of All Time
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
Twitter.com/Matodgey, get ready to mention this every time you bash the Cubs for the rest of your life.
In the bottom of the 6th today, Mike Fontenot singled with one out. The Cubs are down 5-3 and the ball is jumping out the stadium. Bob Brenley even said that he has never seen the ball jump out of here during batting practice like it did today.
Geovany Soto gets to the plate. The count goes full, so Fontenot will be running on the pitch. Soto strikes out swinging and has a really ugly swing, he tries to duck his head to avoid Red's pitcher Corky Miller's follow through from his throw down to second. Miller hits his head anyway, resulting in a call of Fontenot automatically being out at second due to batter interference. Double play. Inning over.
To add injury to insult, Soto was lying down after the play and being attended to by Cubs trainers. He would stay in the game however (thank GOD!).
That sums up our season pretty well so far.
That's how I roll.
Celebrate the 4th with a 5th!
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
Why not? It's to commemorate beating the English. Like you even needed a reason, anyway.
That's how I roll.
4th of July
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
My favorite 4th of July tradition that no one else knows about:
Blind Item reals from CrazyDaysAndNights.net a new one is posted/revealed every 15 minutes. This is like the Super Bowl Sunday for gossip-ophiles.
That's how I roll.
The Most American Thing Possible
(note: the above picture is not Anti-American. You'll notice that the upside down flag has an "X" through it, therefore it logically follows that he is protesting the upside down flag, and not the rightside up flag. Ergo, this is patriotic.)
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
Happy 4th of July everyone. I hope your celebrations of America can be nearly as stereotypical as this one.
Major League Eating Entertains American Troops in Guantanamo.
That's how I roll.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Great Upright Citizen's Brigade Video Page
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
That show kicked large quantities of hind quarters. Here are some good video highlights.
That's how I roll.
Show me the Size of Your A-hole, Miroslav Klose!
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
Miroslav Klose's post-goal celebration could be a cryptic message denote the size of his rectum.
Pay attention particularly at the :59 second mark. It essentially deciphers Klose's code. Here is one of my favorite sketches from Upright Citizen's Brigade:
| Upright Citizens Brigade | ||||
| Bosco's Foot | ||||
| ||||
here is the hand gesture German striker Miroslav Klose makes after he scores:
m'kay.
Oh, by the way, here is Klose coach, Joachim Low picking his nose and eating it.
P.S.
The comedy sketch above was edited. In the actual episode, after Bosco threatened to put his foot in their a-holes, Moses came out and asked if they like tricks.
| Upright Citizens Brigade | ||||
| Moses' Tricks | ||||
| ||||
That's how I roll.
Friday, July 2, 2010
Y AX Y ?
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
The actor who plays Rex Known Do (in Napoleon Dynamite) and Lawrence (Office Space) + Bud Dry = Shweeet.
That's how I roll.
How Could You, Crazy Legs Conti??
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
There is a conspiracy theory that calls into question the legitimacy of Crazy Legs Conti's achievements in competitive eating.
It's awesome/fucking terrible.
You'd think you could trust someone named Crazy Legs.
That's how I roll.
Uhhh, That Isn't Surprising. Like, at all.
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
CNN is reporting some kind of irregularity while someone was trying to dock at the International Space Station.
Something went wrong during a Space Docking(NSFW text) ? This news comes as no surprise to any visitor of UrbanDictionary.com. Even success in Space Docking is still, really, really wrong.
Least surprising news ever.
That's how I roll.
Great Sports This Weekend
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
1. As the English announcer says, Saturday features a soccer match betwixt, "Argenteener and Jaminee." or Argentina and Germany. That will be a doozy. For Germany. The result will forever send the debate between which God likes more: Sausage or Chimichurri. Today's Brazil/Netherlands game taught me that God prefers marijuana and tulips over thongs and tan accelerator.
2. Brock Lesnar vs. Shane Carwin. You aren't going to drop $60 for it on Pay per view? What's that? You're going to go to Twitter and search, "watch ufc116" and going to find an illegal, free feed on the web? No way, me too. I'm picking Carwin to upset Lesnar due to ring rust. He is a long shot, so a safer bet would be to bet that I learned the phrase "ring rust" about two weeks ago. It's true.
3. I Want Revenge makes his long-awaited debut start since his injury that had him scratch on Derby Day in 2009 as the morning-line favorite (only because Quality Road wasn't entered). He is the 7-5 favorite in Belmont Park's Suburban Handicap (Gr.II) on Saturday where he takes on a 2-1 Regal Ransom, among others.
Here he is kicking hiney in the aforementioned Wood Memorial.
That's how I roll.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
If God is so Good, Why Is Mark Brunell Brizoke?
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
Ex-NFL QB Mark Brunell filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy.
A few years ago my friend, while working for a high-end suit company, was at a store when Mark Brunell came in and my friend was dealing with him. He said Brunell is as Jesus-tastic as one can be, and uses his perceived position with god to be an a-hole. My friend, who had zero reason to lie to me, told me this years ago and said that Brunell was 1. just a prick, and 2. would bless people. Like literally make the sign of the cross and act like he was bestowing some sacred gift upon them. It seemed like Brunell himself felt Christ-like and was gifting everyone with his sanctity- whether they wanted it or not. My friend it was condescending, unwelcome, creepy, annoying, unintelligent and just plain rude and annoying. Apparently everyone there found his pious philanthropy to be selfish and just making a scene and was acting like the most annoying Bishop of all time.
Apparently he forgot to bless his bank account. It makes one wonder why Jesus doesn't bankrupt every non-believer. Or why, if Mark Brunell truly did have a hotline to God as he seemed to feel he did, does he have zero legacy in the NFL.
How about this Brunell, how about anyone with an asset/debt ratio of LESS than NEGATIVE $19.2 mil, blesses YOU instead of you blessing them. Because, let's face it, Jesus obvious likes that person a lot more than he likes you. But if/when Brunell meets someone with debts of $19.201 or higher, he is then allowed to bless them.
Thanks for coming out, Mark.
That's how I roll.
Random Analogy
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
Goldman Sachs: short selling :: seeing a crime: instead of helping, you grab a camera, take pictures then sell the pictures to the newspaper.
Agree or disagree?That's how I roll.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Lookalikes v. 37.0 Carlos Tevez and Bubba the Cave Duck
By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, @AndyDisco on Twitter
It's not so much that they are a spitting image of one another, but whenever I see Carlos Tevez he reminds me of Bubba the Cave Duck. He has a certain, how shall I say, Land Before Time quality. You may need to keep an open mind for this one. Maybe they are more kindred spirits than lookalikes, but you get what I'm going for.
And Bubba, the red haired cave duck.
That's how I roll.
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