Where Awesome Happens Election Night Oddsmaking

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com



The odds that Obama wins AND in his speech says, "Yes We Did!": 80%

The odds McCain says the word "fight" in his speech tonight: 95%

The odds McCain says the words "my friends" in his speech tonight: 135%

The odds that McCain admits that Joe the Plumber was a campaign consultant: 15%

The odds that Sarah Palin wears red tonight: 85%

The odds that Sarah Palin says "...good people" at some point tonight on camera: 55%

The odds that McCain/Palin win, and in their victory seech say "About the campaign that promised 'Yes We Can'....well hear this friends- Oh no they di'n't!": 3%

(The odds that I want that happen: 100%)

The odds that Biden gets carried away to a Kid-on-Christmas-Day level annoyance: 60%

The odds that the election is NOT decided before Midnight ET: 5%

The odds that Chris Matthews says something so loudly tonight that you think "Was it really necessary to scream just then?": 98%

The odds that he spits, or has saliva visible in the corners of his mouth and looks as though he is rabid: 88%

The odds that someone on NBC, or MSNBC makes reference to how Tim Russert would have loved this and/or, how they wish they could hear Russert's opinion of tonight: 99%

The odds that CNN's Candy Crowley's hair is parted, and straight as can-be: 100%

The odds that Obama wins and while they interview an ordinary citizen that is a black, senior citizen to put this in perspective they say "Ohh ma gaaad": 15%

The odds that Florida has the most talk of voter fraud, or general voter dissatisfaction: 50%

The odds that voter intimdation is most rampant in ONE of the following cities: Philadelphia, Cleveland, Cincinnati, Miami, Tampa, St. Louis (including East St. Louis) or Gary, IN.: 50%

The odds that Obama wins then in his victory speech admits that he is, in fact, a radical muslim: 85% (I borrowed that one from a Texan oddsmaker).

The odds he wins and declares he is a muslim, but not a radical one: 15%

The odds of CNN's Paul Begala looking hetero the entire night, and not beaming like a Broadway actor during the first curtain-call after opening night: .11%

The odds FoxNews's coverage is Pro-Obama: No one should watch Fox News to find out. That was a trick question.

Over/Under on # of mentions of The Bradley Effect on CNN: 20

" " on MSNBC: 18

" " on Fox News: 125 (But you still shouldn't watch)


Odds that McCain/Palin wins and Rachel Maddow gets misty and says she is so proud of Sarah Palin: -77,000%


Odds of Obama winning and you hearing reference to calling the White House "The Black House" at some point in the next 48 hours: 65%

Odds Obama suggests changing his middle name. To "Osama": 6%






Leave your odds in the comments section.