David Wells Admitting he Flatulated on National TV

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter



Stay Learn to be classy, David Wells. Yet another Yankee "great" acting the ass.










That's how I roll.

Chamillionaire Felt that Michael Jordan was Ridin' Dirty

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


One of my favorite rap one-hit wonders (so far at least) speaks up about getting dissed by Michael Jordan.









That's how I roll.

How do you say, "Best Thing Possible that Doesn't Include Monkeys" in Chinese?

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


There is a Kingdom of Dwarves Theme Park in China.

I wasn't able to copy pictures from that article and post them here. If I could have, rest assured I would have copied the 8th pic (from left to right) which shows "The King" in a red kimono and driving a purple, regular-sized scooter.

Sometimes life is pretty awesome.






That's how I roll.

More Blagojevich Awesomeness

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


I'm not talking about him being on Celebrity Apprentice. I'm talking about this Investigative Report by the Chicago Sun-Times about Hot Rod's jobs-for-favors policy.

You still got it, Rod!







That's how I roll.

Lookalikes v. 27.0- Ronan Tynan and Sloth from Goonies

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


Before you laugh and then say, "That's mean!" Please read this about his anti-semitism. That being said....
























Bab(e)y Ruth?






That's how I roll.

The Only Thing I'll Post About Balloon Boy

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


Since that crazy family hijacked America for a few hours they have an outstanding debt with us. My proposal for their comepensation?

Those stupid parents and their 3 kids, along with the grandparents of those kids, should be forced to watch Last Tango In Paris together while America watches their reactions. The family all has to sit down, on one long couch and watch the whole thing. The cameras will film the faces of the family members through a two-way mirror, and America gets to watch. We also get to watch the kids during a post-viewing Q&A with their parents and grandparents.

And don't say that's child abuse or twisted. Kids in Europe are exposed to that kind of stuff on a daily basis. Besides, that family owes us.

Those parents suck.







That's how I roll.

Wow. Thanks Sun-Times and Craig Newman!

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

The Chicago Sun-Times ran a brief interview between Ernie Banks and Sun-Times writer Craig Newman. It can be seen here.

The very last paragraph mentions that recently Ernie Banks and his wife adopted a baby girl. He links to yours selfishly truly, baby. That was pretty cool.

Thanks Craig.







That's how I roll.

Is Letterman a Wussy Now?

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

I watched Letterman tonight because Don Rickles was on. I figured that if any guest had the stones and the seniority enough to bust on Dave for his recent scandal it would be Rickles.

Early on in the conversation Rickles didn't dive right in, so I thought maybe he would later. A bit later he was telling a story about old timey mobsters in early Vegas, and he joked that he hopes those mafiosos weren't upset at him for talking about them. Then a sandbag dropped from above onto Letterman's desk. When the bag dropped from the set above, Dave and Don looked at eachother and pretended to be shocked, then they went to commercial.

It was just a pre-meditated, scripted bit. Dave Letterman had the most legendary insult comic in history on his show at the time of Letterman's vulnerability and Dave strong-armed him into doing an out-of-character scripted piece.

May your comedic integrity rest in peace, Dave.










That's how I roll.

Progressive Therapy

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


If you're having a bad day, or just need a pick-me-up, I have a plan for you: Crank up Billy Idol's "Rebel Yell" and crotch chop every time he says the word "More". You'll feel much better afteward. Trust me.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the song, here it is with lyrics.




It looks like Professor Slyder has just confirmed that two rights do in fact make a right.






That's how I roll.

Ball 'till you Fall

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


If you go to an Italian dive restaurant that doesn't have plastic garlic on the wall, you aint ballin'. And if you aint gonna ride fly then you might as well hate.





That's how I roll.

Lookalikes v. 26.0- Brendan Ryan and Mr. Hat

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


I couldn't find a good picture of Brendan Ryan and his mustache wearing a hat, so this will have to do.


























This isn't the first time I've thought a major league baseball player looked like a puppet. Roger Clemens also looked like Uncle Joey's puppet, Mr. Woodchuck in Lookalikes v. 12.0







That's how I roll.

Thanks for Coming out, St. Louis

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


Great catch, Holliday. Just because your two starters are among the front runners to win the Cy Young award and both lost on the road to stake you to an 0-2 deficit doesn't mean you suck. Showing zero fight in either game means you do.









That's how I roll.

Hearing It Here First

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


I am expecting video of this to surface at some point, and I want to be on record saying "I remember that".

The employee that David Letterman slept with used to have a recurring spot on the show. I remember in the mid 90's or so, she would appear like other Letterman correspondents do- she seemed unassuming, but willing to play along with Dave. What made her funny wasn't that she actually was funny, but it was funny that Dave decided to put such a normal person on the air. I remember them having a good repoir and Dave seemed very amused by her. I think she dressed like an elf or something once time, and in other I remember Dave and her talking about how she just broke up with her boyfriend and among his negative attributes, he was an awful dancer.

That isn't really Earth shattering, but then I read that the blackmailing guy behind this all, Joe Halderman, was dating the chick, Stephanie Birkitt at the time. The article went on to say that that Halderman really wanted to embarass Dave and exact his revenge on him. So maybe the ex getting made fun of was Halderman.

I hope the video surfaces so I can proved correct. Does anyone else remeber that?







That's how I roll.

White Dude Twerking!

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

This is maybe the worst thing that has ever happened to me: A white dude twerking. It might be the worst thing possible. First Elvis, then Vanilla Ice. White people really do steal culturally from black people. Never was the white man's plunder bigger than this one. They stole a lot of booty. Hellooo.











That's how I roll.

Friendship Litmus Test

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

If you ask your friend, "Would you still be my friend if I liked John and Kate plus Eight?" and they answer "Yes", they are not the kind of friend you want.








That's how I roll.

Bad Theory: Take 2

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

when you see a crowd cheering on some lame-o and that lame-o lamely "raises the roof", they do that to pump up the crowd, right? Like, as if to say, "cheer louder" or something.

I think that if you do the opposite of raising the roof, like say, "lower the floor" wouldn't that then be telling the recipient of your gesture to shut up?

I'm gonna try it in mixed company tomorrow and let you know how its received. It oughta be a big hit.







That's how I roll.

Why I Sometimes Think I'm the Dumbest Person Ever: I Just Made up a Tongue Twister

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter


I was thinking of a funny sentence for my friend's wife to say in her Boston accent. Then I decided I could make a tongue twister from them. It's safe for work if you assume that our hero Richard ordered a device that decodes his own odor.

Dick Ordered the Dakota Dick Odor Decoder

or if you'd like it with a Napoleon Dynamite twist-

Dick Ordered the Decroded Dakota Dick Odor Decoder.








That's how I roll.

Sometimes I Think I'm the Smartest Person Ever

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

While reading Bram Stoker's Dracula I was surprised when I read, and thus re-remembered what I had forgotten- that Dracula feared garlic. Seems pretty silly for an un-dead blood sucker with razor-sharp teeth, and super-human strenght, the ability to turn into a bat and walk through walls to be afraid of a common cooking ingredient.

But I progress....The logical benefit of such information is to eat a LOT of garlic on Halloween night. Like a lot. Preferably raw. Then whenever a vampire trick-or-treater comes to your door, you can breathe in his face, naturally warding him off, saving yourself a mini candy bar or roll of Smarties for your troubles. "Hhhhhappy Hhhhhhalloween!!" oughta work nicely to convey your breath.

Or maybe you can use your newly aquired garlic infused respiratory artillery to scatter those Goth kids loitering outside of your local coffee shop.










That's how I roll.

Did Not see This one Coming

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is a self loathing jew. Seriously.








That's how I roll.

Uhhhh, thanks. gross.

By: T.R. Slyder, TRSlyder@yahoo.com, AndyDisco on Twitter

Uhhh, HuffPo, I assumed Letterman's affair with people. You disgust me, HuffPo. What did you think I thought he had flings with? Jack Hanna's animals? You disgust me, HuffPo. Wait, what were his other flings with? You disgust me, HuffPo.








That's how I roll.